Dear Mom Like Me

Dear mom who is run down, looks like a hot mess, feels like she can't remember who she is, is sure she is failing, feels guilty because she is secretly angry inside, is convinced her life is a hamster wheel, but somehow loves being with these amazing little people even more than she is frustrated by all of the "other" things that come along with them:

You know that you're enough, so I'm not going to tell you that. You know that this too shall pass, and you probably feel like you have no right to even tell anyone how you're feeling because you don't want someone to be confused and think that you aren't grateful for your children or that by feeling this way that you somehow take your children or your moments with them for granted.

I know you don't take the kids for granted. I know you don't take the moments for granted. I know you are grateful. But I also know that you miss yourself. I know that you struggle with being depressed and happy at the same time and man, it's so confusing. I know that you want to scream at doing 400 dishes a day, that Mt. Laundry might as well be called Mt. Never Ending Treadmill and that you just wish you could be a "normal" person (i.e. showering more than once a week) again.

Dear mama, this is what you need to know. This is what I need to know. And this is what we need to remember, and remind each other of daily:

• Your children think you're beautiful.
• No one else knows how messy your house is.
• Your kids don't care how messy your house is. (oh, the irony)
• If you're like me, you just can't accept the fact that your house is going to be messy while you have young children. Instead, work on accepting the fact that you're just going to feel crappy about how the house is while you have you have young children.
• You still have the same smile that your husband fell in love with.
• You can own your new "mom" identity. 
• You don't have to let go of who you used to be. Just because you haven't ran a marathon in 2 years, played piano in 6 months, aced a college exam in 10 years, or learned a new skill that didn't involve your offspring in...a long time..., doesn't mean that those things aren't still a part of who you are. There are seasons, and just because the corn isn't being harvested now, doesn't mean it isn't growing or that it won't be planted again. And if you decide to grow squash next time instead of corn, it's ok. Your entire life makes up you, not just the present.
• It's ok to rest. 
• It's ok to have a bad day.
• It's ok to love and hate what you're doing, where you're at, and to be frustrated by the fact that you can't change it.
• And it's ok to admit that none of these things mean that you don't love your kids more than all the other moms in the world. In fact, they have no effect on the fact that you are a rockstar mom or that your kids are going to grow up, call you blessed, and talk about the awesome memories they have of childhood--because they are going to have them. 

Maybe motherhood of young children is like childbirth; it's excruciatingly difficult at moments, but after it's done, you somehow become oblivious to the difficulties you went through and just remember the amazingness of it instead. Because let's face it, it is amazing hearing a person read for the first time. To see them discover their toes. To hear them say "I love you". The fact that we know what our baby needs by the way she cries. To be the one he needs in the middle of the night. That they want to tell us EVERYTHING. That is amazing.

And you, mama, are amazing, too. Keep your eyes above the waves. You're gonna make it, and you're gonna do great.

<3 div="">

When Your 4-Year-Old Won't Go To Sleep

My son wouldn’t go to bed. It was probably because he slept in late (I let him—it was the first Saturday we’d had as a family in a LONG time) and because he randomly put himself down for a nap during the day (huh?!). I lectured him. I threatened him with grounding. I took things away. He just wouldn’t stay in bed.

I got angry and was just about to fight him when I stopped and realized that he’s Four. And Four turns into Five awful quickly. Five turns into Seven and before you know it, Never Land is something you read about instead of something you experience. And I don’t want to let this fleeting moment go without experiencing it.

So instead of fighting, I told him to grab a bowl. He didn’t miss a beat, pulled up a chair, grabbed some lemonade, and we ate Fire Chips together (Doritos—don’t judge me about the red dye, this is rare).

He showed me his muscles. “Mom, feel them!” He explained how these muscles punch the monsters so they aren’t a problem. “Pow!”

I learned that he wants to “be a giant, like a T-Rex” when he grows up and I watched his face grow disbelief when I told him there would be dinosaurs in Heaven.

He slapped his forehead and grumbled when “the little girl upstairs is crying!” (who is actually Eight, and I’m sure nearly a grown up in his mind). And even though he has no idea who Macaulay Culkin is, he did the Home Alone face when he realized there are TWO Cheerios boxes sitting on top of the fridge. Those are his favorite. Well, not really, but I don’t buy his “favorite” ones, the horrible mother that I am.

We never sit, just the two of us. And never with silence around us. The stillness of the moment gave him the opportunity to explore the stack of old fashioned paper straws that were on the table. I had grumbled through picking them up off of his floor an hour earlier. They’re school manipulatives and are supposed to be helping him learn to count, not to be strewn around, bent, and left to Little Boy ways. But now, he told me to watch because when he spun them, “they go up and down.” Something he would have never learned if he simply used them for counting. He intentionally dropped two on the floor and told me he’s sorry, only to then meet me with a handsome grin when I immediately picked up my own and promptly dropped it on the floor, too.

We talked about art projects he and his older sister had done. He wanted to know if I’d picked his up off the floor where he had left it. Of course, I had. These things are precious to me. And tonight, I got to take time to show that the child who had made that piece of art is precious to me, too.

Thank you, Timmy, for the honor of being your Mommy.

Valentine Creations

It's Valentine's Day in our home! Thanks to shopping throughout the year for all annual events (saves a lot of money to buy on sale and store in my cupboard!), I was able to whip up a few special things for the kids even at 1am after I'd forgotten to plan ahead of time. Thank God he gave me a creative spirit. ;-) Please don't mind the quality of the photos--they were taken on my phone.

My favorite creation of the night (morning?) was my heart garland. I saw a felt heart garland on Pinterest and just modified it to use paper and a stapler instead of fabric and a sewing machine. Quick and easy, and it's SUPER cute hanging from the dining room entry way!

 At each child's place setting, a special surprise was waiting including a wrapped Valentine themed book, an educational magazine, and a decorated page that we filled out throughout the day with "things we love" about each child. A keepsake!

 One thing I found recently while cleaning out the "everything" room was a box of business cards that was ordered online but never used. I was going to throw them in the recycling bin but decided I should hang onto them because they *may* have a brilliant future...and boy, am I glad I kept them! I created two games using the cards.



First, a numeral recognition/counting game by using glittery textured stickers one one card, and then using a marker to write the numeral on a subsequent card. I couldn't fit more than 8 stickers on a card so that's where I ended, but you could certainly get 10 or 12 if you were using small stickers.

The second game, and also the more popular one, is a matching game. Since all of the "business" sides of the cards are the same, they offer great memory game potential! I used felt stickers that have different layers and edge shapes which provide an added tactile element to the traditional visual memory games. Isn't the Valentine theme darling? Best yet, both of these games store in a small Ziploc bag which means easy clean up and great storage because you can see the contents of the bag!

And of course, a Valentine making station. :) Glitter glue, stickers, paper, heart hold punches, crayons, markers, pom poms...you name it, it was there! Not as big of a hit as I thought it was going to be, though. True to form, toddlers prefer playing outside in the mud as to sitting at a table doing something constructive. Who'da thought, right? ;-)

Happy Valentine's Day! 

...and remember, regardless of your situation or circumstance, you are loved.

For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whoever believes in him will never perish, but will have eternal life. John 3:16

40 Questions To Ask Your Child On Date Night

I think it was daughter number five (I'm the second oldest of eight girls) who coined the term "Donut Date" to refer to when our Daddy would take one of us individually out on a "date" with him when I was young. It generally meant we were getting a donut or going to the grocery store for some root beer or another treat, which was a pretty big deal at the time. In fact, I still bug my Dad to take me on a date, except I hope it's to places like Disney World or a major music concert these days. ;-) Now, the tradition has moved on and I date my own three-year-old daughter. She gets terribly excited when I ask her if she wants to have a "mommy-daughter date". There are no arguments and she is on her best behavior while we go to the local coffee shop for a slice of carrot cake and juice! My favorite part, though? The conversation. My phone gets put away, no books are brought along, and we don't sit at a table with anyone else (though she has a way about her that attracts the elderly men to come over for a chat about her baby doll!). Instead, we chat. I ask questions, and we dream together over hot cocoa and cookies.

Dating your children is an easy and precious way to create beautiful moments for the two of you. Here are 40 Date Night questions to get you started:

1. What is the best dream you ever had, and why?


2. What is the worst dream you ever had, and why?


3. How do you like to be woken up in the morning?


4. What are the top five things you are good at doing?


5. What are the three occupations you would love to have when you grow up?


6. If you were to plan your own funeral, what would you want it to be like?


7. What are five activities you want to do within the next year?


8. Who is your best friend, and why?


9. What person can you not stand, and why?


10. What embarrasses you that I do?


11. What are you proud of that I do?


12. What makes you laugh?


13. What makes you cry?


14. What are the top three things I do that make you feel (not "know") loved?


15. What is the most important thing you have learned in life?


16. If you were to plan a sleepover, what would it include?


17. If you were to be one animal, what would you be and why?


18. What are your three favorite songs and why?


19. What one song can't you stand, and why?


20. What is your favorite movie, and why?


21. What are the top three reasons why you know you will be a good spouse/parent when you are grown?


22. What is your favorite physical feature about yourself and why?


23. What three things do you not like about yourself, and why?


24. When people compliment you, what is the top thing they say about you?


25. What are the top three compliments from others that you would like them to say about you?


26. What is your favorite Bible story and why?


27. What is your favorite Bible verse and why?


28. Who are your top two favorite historical characters and why?


29. In your life, what has been your proudest moment?


30. In your life, what has been your most embarrassing moment?


31. If you were to create your own job to earn money, what would you do and how would you do it?


32. If you were to create your own cake and own ice-cream sundae, what ingredients would you include?


33. What makes you feel safe?


34. What makes you feel scared?


35. What are two things that your friends or other people you know do that you don't like?


36. What are two things that your friends or other people you know do that you would also like to do?


37. Would you rather be a boy or a girl, and why?


38. If you could go anywhere in the world and do anything you wanted, where would you go and what would you do?


39. What school subject are you smartest in, and how do you know?


40. What school subject do you struggle the most in, and how do you know?

Love Happens Here

I am the full time mama of a 3-year-old and 18-month-old. My children are 20 months apart. While I do work full time, I consider myself a stay-at-home mama just as much as I consider myself a working-outside-the-home mama. In fact, I find that the 40 hours a week that I spend at my "job" is easier and less stressful than the other 128 hours a week I spend with my kiddos. Sometimes, I think I'm going crazy, and I crave to go to work...the funny thing is, as soon as I'm at work, I miss my babies something fierce! It's a funny world, the blend between working motherhood and home motherhood.

Before anything else, I am a mother. Lately, I have been working 40-hours-straight every weekend so that I can be the one with my children during the week. I go in at 7pm Friday night, and stay until Sunday at 11am. Marvelous, it is, but it's also a schedule cut out for someone who belongs in a loony bin. Imagine the possibility of being awake for many hours straight and responsible for people's lives no matter how tired you are? Yes, I am a paramedic. And yes, your life will always come before my need for sleep and no matter how tired I am, you are going to get my absolute best care. Imagine packing three people up for three days, and getting your house in order before that so when you come back, you have something clean to wear.

Because I choose my children to come first (ok, after God!), I do things a little differently. I work ridiculous shifts so that I can be the one with them 5 days a week. The house is sometimes a mess because I don't park them in front of the TV so I can clean all of the time. I have no idea what current TV shows are playing. I haven't read anyone's blog in forever (I miss that!). Lately, I haven't even been able to work out (UGH). My sewing projects are still waiting, my bedroom still isn't arranged the way I want it to be, and sometimes, I get lonely being with no other adults sometimes for days on end. However...

There are a lot of things that we do. We do family. Lego creations get built. Magnificent make believe stories get told. Dancing in the living room happens. We do loud. Songs are sung. Pictures are painted. Baby dolls are rocked. Giggle erupt constantly. Tickle fights are a routine. Jumping on the bed (shhhhh!) sneaks in.We do discipline. Spankings, time out's, and "the look" may be given throughout the day---but they are overshadowed by hugs, attention, and the exchange of a thousand magical kisses. We do learning. Snowflakes are tasted. Letters are traced. Colors are mixed. Chores are done (even if they aren't real effective yet!). We do love.

Love happens here, and that is why those other things we don't do aren't really missed.

Beatboxing Flute to Make You Happy

Flute Beatboxing

Have a great Wednesday!