My family was there. Really, we've been there for a few years. Our "crazy" has meant court battles, managing a child with PTSD episodes and other behaviors that are hard to manage, two years of not living in our own home, periods of joblessness, job changes, living in a small apartment with five people, me homeschooling and managing moving and the kids while my husband has been away more than he hasn't for his job the last year...but it's starting to break. Homeschooling is getting easier. My husband just came home after being gone for almost all of the last three months (even though he's gone again next week). My daughter is currently in an improved phase, and I found some REALLY promising resources for her in the location we're in now. Our family court appeal is going to be heard on October 28, and we currently don't have any other ongoing trials to deal with. And today...today, we are finally closing on this beautiful log cabin home in the woods. Peace. Wow!
It's a long story, and it still continues. But God is faithful. He has so much love for us, and He has continued to provide even when our circumstances have literally been impossible. I am so thankful, so grateful, so humbled by it all. How great the Father's love for us.
So we're beginning. Continuing. Reviving ourselves as we near the end of the struggles we've been facing. Running as fast as we can toward the relief that we want to wash over us. Being silent, because we don't know what to say as we just breathe. It feels so good to finally breathe again, and not in hurried, panicked breathes that we choke on as we try to save ourselves. If I've learned anything, it's that we can't save ourselves. We can't save our children. We can't save anyone. We can only release ourselves. Release our children. Release others.
Today, we mark another step in reviving our life, and we are so ready.